Confidence is gritty because a person has been sandpapered by life! You need to rub against life, be knocked down, and get up again. If you avoid challenges because you think you can’t handle them, you will reinforce those feelings of insecurity.
You can’t just read about confidence and become confident. Lean into life’s challenges and decide to do something different. Turn a new way of thinking into a new way of being.
In hard times and difficult situations, there is a confidence opportunity waiting to be uncovered. You find the opportunity when you begin to shift from feeling helpless to finding a way to challenge yourself. When you realize you can handle hard stuff, it changes how you think about yourself. If you can do it once, you can do something else hard too.
Uncovering A Confidence Opportunity:
I have many stories I could share with you about how people can do hard things even with doubt and fear. Listen to how this man found a growth opportunity a midst a hard time.
A man runs out of the prescription medication he has been over-using to check out when life gets hard. He begins to panic and feel more anxious than the situation warrants. He realizes that he has become more dependent on the medication than he wants to be. It is telling him what he needs instead of him directing his medication use.
He knows if he shares this with the doctor, he may be given more medication. He decides to lean into the panic and see how long he can function without the medication he is dependent on.
His family gets anxious and wants to send him to the emergency room for more medication, but he stays focused on his daily goals. He ends up going a week without the medication he had been overusing.
What started out as a man who wants to numb himself becomes a man who realizes he can manage himself in hard times. Again and again, people can fall to the depths of despair only to tackle the challenges they face.
4 Steps to Growing Confidence:
Using this example, what can you do to start shifting your own fears and insecurity?
Step 1 = Boost Awareness The first step is always becoming more aware of where you want to grow your confidence. Identify what blocks you from becoming more confident. For instance, if you rely heavily on what others think you can do, it may block your own discovery and growth.
Step 2 = Shift Your Thinking Once you identify your roadblocks to becoming more confident, how do you start to shift your thinking from helpless to grittiness? Look for evidence that you have done hard stuff before. Entice yourself to rise to the challenge again.
Step 3 = Thinking into Action: It’s not enough to think you can do it, you need to take the next step and test yourself. Imagine running yourself through an experiment and look for ways to act as if you can do hard stuff. Even though it’s uncomfortable, can you do it anyway?
Step 4 = Repeat Confidence Steps The more you repeat leaning into hard stuff, the more you will find you can handle more than you originally thought. But if you avoid the challenge that life brings, you will reinforce your fears. And who wants more fears?!
Life may be like sandpaper, but we can be just as gritty. Surprise yourself by grabbing the opportunity to grow in life’s challenges.
Please share in the comments how your confidence grew when you made it through a hard time.
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